Forever Real with Eric Jones

Strangeness of Tears

2007-09-11T06:31:00.000-05:00

In keeping with what today is in anniversary of and the tone of my post last week (my first post in a loooong time), I had decided that this week would be in contemplation of what makes us people and how we feel. I shed tears as I made my post last week, and as this day has barely begun for me, I have already shed tears thinking about where I was on that day and where I was when it happened.

But it feels strange to cry sometimes. Perhaps it has been too long since I cried merely for the cathartic value of a tear shed. Maybe because for men to cry it is seen as a sign of weakness, and who wants to be seen as weak, right? It could even be that you don't want to have to explain to someone exactly why your face is so red and exactly you were just crying about because it would likely result in more tears.

I think we as a society are restrained in too many ways, and not enough in others. Now, maybe people like Laura Ingraham, conservative radio talk show host are right about the "pornification" of our culture. In that sense we are not nearly restrained enough. But for the mere concept of tears results in so much inner turmoil for a person, that is the true sign that something about our society is genuinely screwed up.

So go out there and let your feelings be known. All stifling your feelings is going to do is hurt yourself in the long term and diminish your usefulness to yourself and those that rely on you. I'm not saying go out into the world and become some sort of overly-militant activist for and be a complete prick to the rest of the world, but the only thing that's going to result from holding all those tears on the inside is mildew of the soul.

I Am A Rock, Yet Who Shall Be Mine?

2007-09-06T19:41:00.000-05:00

I know it's been a long time and I hate to come back on such a downer, but I need to talk again.

I feel pain in my heart. It is no small wound.

Not any more, at least.

It has been gnawing at me for quite some time now. It has been as if some part of my soul has atrophied and fallen away, and the only thing rushing in to fill the gap left in its wake is more darkness.

The tears push outwards, inevitably working their way through whatever half-assed defenses I try and stall them with. I can stop the tears when I am around others, but it feels like trying to block the flow of an ocean with a beaver dam.

I fear the day that I know will one day come. The day I will burst into tears uncontrollably and fall into a whimpering heap on the floor in front of someone. The day I become useless.

I have never seriously thought of killing myself. That is not to say I have never contemplated suicide. In truth, I believe the thought goes through the mind of every person, no matter how sane they may or may not be. But I know that should I ever do that my absence would cause an irreparable harm to those who know me. And I have been raised better than that.

And I believe to some large degree therein lies the crux of the matter.

For the most part, I am a fairly generous person, constantly giving of myself and my time to almost anyone. I try to be everything to everyone because there is so much I can do and so much that everyone else needs, and many times I am the only person who can or will give. I give and give of myself to such a degree that I no longer know who I am. I stay so busy that there really is no time for me to figure it out.

I believe I am probably bipolar, or at least suffer from occasional bouts of depression. I know there are times that I display many of the symptoms associated with both. But I fear that if I go to a doctor, psychiatrist, therapist or whatever, they will say “You must take this pill!” and the second that I do, I will cease to be the man that God made me. I will no longer have the talents that God blessed me with and I will no longer be able to fulfill whatever destiny God had in store for me. I will ultimately lose the drive that keeps me going. And that is the last part of me I know that is redeemable. That is the part of me that everyone loves, or at least tolerates. And it is the part of me that they need. I fear I will no longer be the “me” that God has made me and will become whatever “me” the chemical makes me.

It just get a little difficult sometimes, being the “rock” that others rely upon.

Who will be my “rock”?

I ponder just walking away from it all sometimes. Just getting up from wherever I happen to be whenever the mood strikes me and keep walking. Not to any place in particular. Just some place else and watch from the sidelines.

Not that I’d ever really go. Too many people need me and would be hurt if I left, and I can’t let that happen. And besides, when it comes right down to it, there’s no place that I really want to go.

And there’s too much work to be done.

And never enough time.

For the Record, I'm Not Anti-Government, I'm Anti-Corrupt Government

2006-01-12T11:50:00.000-05:00

And this is a problem that I often have while I'm thinking about the social and political dichotomies that exist in our world today. When I talk about what I and many others like me believe in, I always hear "You're anti-government, aren't you?"

And my response is "I'm anti-corrupt government. Are you saying we can't have one (governemnt) without the other (corruption)?"

Which is something that you really have to think about hard. The old adage is that "Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely." And this seems to be eternally true. Our elected representatives are, to a certain extent, placed into power over us. And it seems inevitably that with this power we grant them to reflect and enact our collective wills over each other they go to expand their powers beyond those originally granted them, allowing themselves to do things (they believe) that they have no business doing.

Once again, its just a question of where do we as a people draw the line? Where can we draw the line? I'm not entirely sure, but we need to do it and we need to do it soon.

Not much, just a thought for the day.

Social Attrocities On The Part of the Current Administration

2006-01-11T12:42:00.000-05:00

Everyone knows I hate Bush. Trim it, wax it, I don't care. Do what you've got to do, but get rid of it.

Oh, and then there's the matter of our illustrious president and his staff. I'm no fan of this group of cretins. At first it was my disgust with their collective lack of intelligence. Then it moved onto their abuse of this "war on terror" nonsense.

But now, my disgust has gone to brand new levels. These people need to be removed from their positions as soon as possible.

Consider for a moment the recent allegations of the electronic monitoring of communications of American citizens. Yes, we all know that its "to fight terrorism" and is only done to "suspected Al-Queda affiliates." That is complete and utter bull, and has been shown to be such. We know that its used on American citizens and extends beyond terrorism and even the pretense of crime=terrorism.

But there is one thing that makes this worse: the obvious misunderstanding and misuse of the President's "Commander-in-Chief" status. They apparently think that this gives Dubya carte blanche to do whatever the hell he pleases. A staff member was even caught on tape at a recent speech at a major university saying that, if he wanted to, the President could order the torture of a suspected terrorist's child to illicit information from the suspect, even by such means as crushing the child's testicles.

No, I'm not lying. A camera was snuck into this speech / presentation which cameras were not allowed at (no wonder why) and this person was caught on tape saying these things.

Tell me this is not wrong. Tell me that we as Americans are not so collectively numbed down that we can accept this. Even having this on our television shows is one thing (not an okay one), but to let ourselves become so dead inside, so numb to this sort of thing due to overexposure from the media is almost as bad is it happening in the first place. Its almost as bad as saying that is okay, that he has the right to be order that it be done (even in the broadest, most theoretical sense).

American society is dying inside.

Its time we all stand up and say "This is not okay. This is not acceptable. Leave your office so we can put someone sensible, moral, and still human in your place."

The Start of Daily Posts

2006-01-10T12:15:00.000-05:00

Starting today I'm going to be back on daily weekday posts.

Honest.

Hand to god!

I figure since part of my resolutions are to become more disciplined for the new year, part of executing that resolution is setting and adhering to schedules. So part of that scheduling is that I'm going to set aside time to post each day.

Yeah, I know what you're saying. "He's not going to. He's blowing smoke up our sphinctoral orifices."

We shall see.

We shall see.

Happy New Year All! I'm Back, Refreshed, And Ready To Take On The World!

2006-01-03T18:08:00.000-05:00

I've gotten all the bad funk out of my system, got the good funk on. It was a funk-transplant!

And, like everyone else, I've got a few resolutions for the New Year. Let's go over them in order, shall we?

1) I resolve to be more disciplined. I've really let myself slide a lot, especially over this past year. I'm not proud of it, and it really hurts me physically and emotionally.

2) I resolve to keep my cool. I let my emotions, anger especially, get the best of me more often than I'd care to admit.

3) I resolve to act with more common sense. The rest of the world could also be better off for following this one. I just need to think things through more logically and look at all the facts before rashly jumping to conclusions.

4) I resolve to live by one simple inspirational quote.

This is the note I'm going to leave on for today. Its a quote that I've long drawn inspiration from and most everyone, especially everyone would do well to follow. And here it is...

"One ought, every day at least, to hear a little song, read a good poem, see a fine picture and if it were possible, to speak a few resonable words."

~Johan Wolfgang von Goethe

Man, I HATE Finals Season!!! Flaws In Electronic Testing System

2005-12-13T17:59:00.000-05:00

I try to take everything in stride, but this really just gets my goat so to speak.

I know "Finals Time" is something that everyone in higher education has to look forward to, or dread. I know that, especially in a technical college, they like to do everything electronically. And I can deal with that.

What I am tired of, however, is the rather lack-luster online testing program utilized at my school. Truth to be told, I have never taken a test via this method that has not had a number of istakes as well as repeated questions. I'm sure a lot of this is due to human error, but there has to be some of it that could be caught if the program itself were structured a little differently. But, then again, the poor structure of the testing program goes back to human error, doesn't it?

It's like that old saying goes... "To err is human. To really screw up, you need a computer."

I'm just venting right now, but it really is horribly done. All of the questions are created and input manually, and from the looks of things, without the aid of a spell-check utility. The interface for students is simple html encoding: questions are done in 100 small tables ( 1 per question), answer choices are done in simple radial buttons.

Seems simple enough, no?

But here's where the fun comes in. It is essentially set up merely for multiple choice questions. Multiple choice - multiple answer questions are accomplished by use of a button that lists the potential multiple choices (such as A and C, A and B, etc... you get the idea). It wouldn't be so bad if it were not for the presence of blank questions, blank choices, mis-spellings, and duplicated questions. Seriously. Exactly worded, question and answer, multiple times. Exactly worded, question and answer, multiple times. Exactly worded, question and answer, multiple times.

See, that was annoying, wasn't it?

And that was what I felt the entire time.

I have no problem taking an electronic examination that basically serves little more function than to tell some bureaucrat that educational standards may or may not be being met. I am so completely fine with that. What I am not fine with is when I sit down to take it, I basically have to stare at what looks like a poorly created webpage by a fifth-grader with not nearly enough time to go back and double-check his work like he should.

I know there no real relevance to this post. I just needed to vent for a sec. But I suppose that it does, if nothing else, show that not caring about your work always affects (and likely annoys) someone (if not many people) waaaaay down the line.

***Note: I would like to point out, that in this particular post only, ALL mistakes were intentional. Honest. Not so for the others tho.***

Why Reincarnation Makes Sense To Me From A Semi-Scientific Standpoint

2005-12-12T15:51:00.000-05:00

As I've said before, I consider myself to be a Christian. Non-denominational and somewhat scholarly, but a Christian nonetheless. Still, this does not stop me from studying the occult and other religions and doing comparative analyses and whatnot.

One thing I've been thinking about for the last few weeks is the thought of reincarnation. With the 15 year-old Napalese child believed to be the reincarnation of the Buddha, it really begs the question of "Is it really possible?"

Perhaps.

And please, before I'm denounced as a non-Christian, hear me out.

If you believe that people have souls and that the soul exists as a quasi-substantial energy waveform, then perhaps it is not a very far-fetched idea. Consider: in this universe, all the energy that has ever and will ever exist is in existance at this very moment. Energy, which all things are made of, is neither created nor destroyed, it merely changes form.

So, people have souls. People die. We know what in happens to the body. The soul still holds some debate. As a Christian, I do believe we go to Heaven (or Hell, depending on one's life). In such a fashion, it seems that if Heaven (and Hell) were in a seperate dimension or existential plane from our own, that for this energy to leave our own dimension and for our universe to maintain an energy-constant, than it must stand that a new soul enters our world in a newborn or what have you to live its new life, die, and repeat the process.

Now this raises the issue of if its the same since soul it was from leaving the dying body or not. Honestly, I still have not completely formed my opinion on this. Perhaps the same raw energy form returns, with the mind/personality/memory-set to live out whatever afterlife our creator has decided upon for it. Its possible, and sounds somewhat reasonable to me.

Perhaps, if you're not a Christian or a person of a similar cosmological belief-set, then perhaps the Heven/Hell step of the equation is skipped over, then the mind/personality/memory-set and soul remain as a complete set and go on to live a new life in hopes of coming back as something better in one's next existance as something better. This is my understanding of strict reincarnation beliefs such as those found in Buddhism.

Again, I'm just trying to get people to think. Not particularly one way or another, but merely to think.

If we have in this world all the energy that we are ever going to have, then what really happens to the energy of the soul when we die?

Do we really move on to become one with the force?

I guess we'll just have to wait and see about that when the time comes.

But still, just imagine...

You Ain't Ever Seen A Fat Man Do Such A Happy-Dance!: X-Box 360 Lawsuit HO!!!

2005-12-06T13:41:00.000-05:00

It started off as the usual morning: woke up late, hated myself for it, promised not to do it again. Got dressed, fixed a bite to eat, took a call from a telemarketer, got to school, logged on to my trusted lappy, pulled up Firefox (the other web-browsing meat), and checked the morning news links from the BBC.

And I got up in a room of 12 people in the student canteen area and did my happy-dance! I wasn't an embarassing moment either, 'cause Microsoft is getting what it deserves with this X-Box 360 nonsense: a big PIMP slap in the face (a big PIMP for that big MONEY they have)!

Here's a link to the article in its entireity.

And in all honesty, this really is what those guys deserve. Microsoft (a word which when also coupled with either the word "beta" or "early" spells D-I-S-A-S-T-E-R for the public in general). engineered this artificial scarcity of the systems to drive up worldwide public demand, as well as to beat their industrial competitors to the market with their "next-gen" console and gain a more substantial foothold in the hearts of the gaming public.

So what did this ultimately mean for us gamers?

It meant the big-boys were trying to play keep-up with each other. At first they were not going to do backwards compatability. Then a competitor comes out and says they are. Then Microsoft comes back and says "O yeah, that's what we meant. Just with only select titles, and only after a software download via X-Box Live."

It meant that a product that obviously did not go through all the testing that it should have has been rushed out onto the market merely to rape our wallets to the tune of $250 to $500 a pop for a figurative "time-bomb" that could go at any moment with overheating processors and power supplies burning out, only to send it in for repairs or replacements.

Its a good thing that Nintendo and Sony are waiting. Sure, Sony products have their shre of problems, but usually not this bad and to this extent. And when was the last time a Nintendo product with problems this bad. Well, since the NES (the system that truly tested your lung-power as much as your gaming prowess)... NOT A DAMN ONE!

I love Nintendo and I cannot lie.
You other gamers can't deny.
When a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist
and a DS in your face
you get SPRUNG!

Microsoft, you can kiss my big, hairy butt! Come back when you've got a good product to put out!

So... I guess I'll see you guys this time next year for Windows Vista? Love ya', mean it!

Ann Coulter Is A Moron, Bill O'Reily Is A Moron, And If You're Calling For Violence Against Them, You're A Moron Too!

2005-12-01T20:43:00.000-05:00

Right now I am sitting here in the tech-school canteen watching two idiots talking to each other on T.V.: Bill O'Reily and Ann Coulter. These are two of the most small-minded, biased, pseudo-intellectuals who I've watched together in a while. And I hate this type of people. The people who can't think for themselves. The type of people who encourage "the party line" and not thinking for yourself. I have no use for these people.

And I have no use for people who would commit violence against these people.

Let's get serious for a moment. Even if there really are people out there calling for Ann Coulter's rape (which I seriously hope there are not), what does doing that really accomplish other than making yourself look like a monster?

What purpose would that accomplish?

All you are doing by calling for violence or rape against people like Ann Coulter is giving them more ammo against anyone who does not share their narrow-minded set of views.

Look. There's no law against having a fantasy. But if you fantasize about violating someone and act out those fantasies, there are laws against that. Especially that. Look, just keep it to yourself.

And besides, who'd want to touch that anyway? She's probably been passed around more than a doobie for all you know. I'm not slandering her. I'm just saying...

New Kid On The Block!

2005-11-29T16:06:00.000-05:00

Over the weekend my brother and I were looking at the insanity caused by the recent X-Box 360 launch (or as we like to call it... Microsoft milking a dead cow). And after reading about some moron in Virginia holding up an EB Games for two of the systems, and an article about one of those Anti-Grand Theft Auto lawyers, he found his breaking point.

Kind of like how I found mine back when Pat Robertson got on television and called for the direct assassination of the president of that country. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about...

Well, he started his blog, trying to get his thoughts out there and bring a little sense and order back into this chaotic world in which we live.

So without further adieu, because I'm all out of adieu, allow me to present you...

Blind Patriot!

S'Been A While...

2005-11-29T16:02:00.000-05:00

I'm back again. Sorry about the protracted vacation. School's been busy what with this quarter coming to a close and trying to get crap ready for the next one. Looks like after the next one, I should only have one quarter left.

Then I'll have my Networking Admin Diploma! KA-WOOT!

Hopefully now I'll have time to get back to regular posting, and soon I'll have a colored pic to post as part of my portfolio. Its one I downloaded and hope to turn into a studio as one of their audition pieces. I'll let you all know how that's gonna go.

So for now it's good to be back, and I'll catch you later.

Odd Proficiency With Comic-Coloring

2005-11-14T13:48:00.000-05:00

All right, if you know me (or have at least been reading the blog for a while) then you know that I'm an aspiring penciler. However, thanks to a friend of mine, since last week I've had a unique opportunity and a few unique experiences.

I was getting ready to go lunch with a friend of mine on the school faculty, and I noticed he had a Wacom board laying around his office. *DROOL* I asked him if he used it any, he said no, I asked if I could borrow it, he said "Sure, knock yerself out," and I thought "F***ING SWEET!"

For those of you with no clue what a Wacom board, basically its a nice electronic mousepad/mouse/pen setused for electronic illustrating. To me, and most people in the biz, its much easier to use than the traditional mouse or touchpad, especially if you have some degree of proficiency or training in drawing by hand.

So I got to mess around with it and Adobe Photoshop and... I think I'm in love! I downloaded some blank lineart and went to town and found out I'm a little more proficient with coloring in the old-school than I would have thought, so I might have to add "colorist" to my potential talents. Now if only I could work on that damn "inking" thing...

Second Episode Boondocks Post: My Sides Still Hurt!!!

2005-11-14T13:36:00.000-05:00

No joke. I still ache a little from how hard I was laughing last night. In under thirty minutes we have again been offended, enlightened, and entertained. And I still have to say its better at its job than South Park is. Sorry Comedy Central, you're still my boys, but Boondocks just does it right with anthropological and pop-culture jabs all across the board, leaving no group out of the side-splitting hilarity.

So that's that for now. I'd just like to reiterate to those Fox tv executives out there: you screwed the pooch by passing up on this one.

When this does come out in season compilations, I WILL BE THE FIRST ONE IN MY AREA IN LINE FOR IT! So boo-yah and catch ya' all later.

Did You Catch "The Boondocks" This Past Sunday on Cartoon Network's Adult Swim?

2005-11-10T15:24:00.000-05:00

It was a brilliant masterpiece that should go down in the annals of animated history as one of the best cartoons of all time. But fair warning, it is most assuredly not for the culturaly faint-of-heart. Especially if you're not a fan of the "N"-word (and I'm not talking "neocon here").

Hailed as one of the most consistently funny and intelligent comics ever, Fox missed the boat on this one. Picked up by Adult Swim , this will most likely be its newest and best hit ever (hey, I'm an Aquateen fan too, but c'mon, that show's about as smart as a sack of rusted hammers thrown into the bottom of the Marianas Trench). If you caught it, or at least read the strip from time to time, you can tell it was likely too racy for Fox and therefore right at home on Adult Swim .

There is a lot of racial humor, and like I said the "N"-word got threw around quite a bit (probably enough for some kind of TV record, but I digress), but it really goes waaaaay beyond that and appeals to a much broader audience because its not all just black people poking fun at financially well-off white people being stupid, arrogant and easily scared (allthough that is pretty funny, especially in the opening dream-sequence for the first episode).

I'm telling you. White guys and black guys both get together and watch this show. It's a thought-provoking laugh riot that stimulates the mind and crosses racial boundaries like nothing before in the history of television, in my honest opinion.

Best Day I've Had In A Loooooong Time

2005-11-10T14:58:00.000-05:00

I apologize for no post yesterday, but after I got home from work I had a few extra projects to catch up on for my dad, so I ended up missing the midnight deadline for Tuesday and Wednesday and decided, you guys needed a break as did I, but here's some good news. A first in the short history of this blog: Nothing to whine about today! Ka-Woot! Huzzah! And a nice How Do You Like Me NOW!!!

It started at 5:00 this morning. My brother and I got up, went to the gym for about an hour, and grabbed a bite on our way back. I came home, studied for a while, took a shower, scanned some stuff for EBay, left for school. And all this is by 10:00 in the A.M. Got there, studied and did some homework for my other class, went out to lunch at my favorite lil' seafood resteraunt in town, came back, took and passed a test in my first class of the day. I feel good.

Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride.
Nothing's gonna slow me down.
Oh no.
I got to keep on movin'.

I'm hoping for many days like this. So, for today at least, nothing to genuinely complain about, so to everyone, best wishes for you and yours from now 'till the end of time.

Thinking Back To The 2004 Election: The Concept of "Wasting Your Vote"

2005-11-07T22:28:00.000-05:00

This afternoon I began thinking back to a conversation I had with a friend of mine a few weeks ago. I don't recall exactly how the conversation started. Most likely it was with some quip about "trimming the Bush" (my regretting his getting voted in for a second term and him not being impeached for criminal acts and whatnot) and lamenting his reelection. Now this friend in question is a National Guard recruiter and is a man I genuinely respect. I readily admit if I were going to be conned into military service, it'd take him to do it.

Anyway, he asked me who I voted for. I informed him that I voted for one of the independent candidates, Michael Badenarick (I'm sure I horribly butchered his name, but I will look it up and correct it soon), to which he responded"So, you wasted your vote?" I glanced at him, gave my usual arrogant grin and retorted "No, I voted for the man who I knew could do the job right." And I still stand by that decision.

But one thing I still think about in the back of our head is, when it really comes down to it, we both wasted our vote. And think about it for a second. To a certain extent, you likely did as well.

Consider for a moment what happened nationwide since the election debacle back in 2000. After all the hanging-chad bull, it was decided by the wisdom of our overlords that the wisest thing to do to prevent vote fraud and confusion was to place electronic voting machines all across the country. Personally, I would have just... oh, I don't know, put people with common sense and not criminal records and penchants for corruption in charge of voting, but that's neither here nor there. But if you voted on one of these machines like I did, and I am sure that my friend also did, then you also "wasted your vote."

It has been proven time and again since these devices were instated that they are easy to hack and manipulate. And then when you throw in that there are reputed computer criminals in high positions of these electronic voting machine companies, and also take into account that many of these companies have key political officials either directly owning or as key investors, the whole thing stinks to high-heaven of corruption. And before you say anything else, yes, all this can be proven.

But what can we do about this? Well, if you're paranoid to the extent that I am, we obviously can't just "vote the machines out" because if the system reaelly is just that corrupt, we cannot believe that the people really counting the votes will not rig things to ensure that these devices will not be removed. It will take more than that. I'm not calling for violence or riots in the streets. All that does is cause traffic jams, and the last thing you want is me mad behind the wheel. Or mad in general, but that's a story for another day. What it is going to take is a mass outcry to all your representatives at the state and national levels that you don't want these corrupt and infinitely fallible devices in place, and that they all need to be removed and scrapped. This needs to be done on such a scale that even the corrupt and biased mainstream media has no choice to accurately report the movement and ensure that America once again has a secure vote.

Weapons Of Mass Destruction In Iraq: Doing My Part To Stir The Pot

2005-11-04T13:28:00.000-05:00

Okay. If you know me, you know that I support troops, I don't like Bush, and I know that we as a collective in this country have been mislead into thinking that this was has been just, and that nearly every reason we have been given to justify it is..., well, a lot of bull droppings.

I know some of you are saying "But Eric, how can you say you're for the troops but against the war? That's contradictory!" And I'd respond by saying that you're probably the shallow sort of thinker that believes John Kerry (and don't get me wrong, I hate this guy too) was flip-flopping when he said that he "voted for the war before he voted against it." I have friends and know people in the military and they're all good people. That's why it really tears me up inside to think that they're over fighting a battle that we've been mislead by the nose into fighting.

The country stays divided on this, due mainly to the contradictory stories released through most mainstream media sources. A lot of this comes through because of the network-in-question's particular slant on issues, and much of it comes through from White House press releases. Still, despite all this, even mainstream media screws up and lets some truth out from time to time.

To start with, let's go over a few of the base things that I take issues with concerning the war. We'll take a look at two issue a week for the next few weeks. Firstly, the issue of weapons of mass destruction. An article released through the Associated Press via MSNBC adresses this. Here's a link to the article here, and to preserve it for future posterity, I'll quote it below.

CIA’s final report: No WMD found in Iraq
Recommends freeing detainees held for weapons knowledge

Updated: 9:24 p.m. ET April 25, 2005

WASHINGTON - In his final word, the CIA’s top weapons inspector in Iraq said Monday that the hunt for weapons of mass destruction has “gone as far as feasible” and has found nothing, closing an investigation into the purported programs of Saddam Hussein that were used to justify the 2003 invasion.

“After more than 18 months, the WMD investigation and debriefing of the WMD-related detainees has been exhausted,” wrote Charles Duelfer, head of the Iraq Survey Group, in an addendum to the final report he issued last fall.

“As matters now stand, the WMD investigation has gone as far as feasible.”

In 92 pages posted online Monday evening, Duelfer provides a final look at an investigation that occupied over 1,000 military and civilian translators, weapons specialists and other experts at its peak. His latest addenda conclude a roughly 1,500-page report released last fall.

On Monday, Duelfer said there is no purpose in keeping many of the detainees who are in custody because of their knowledge on Iraq’s weapons, although he did not provide any details about the current number. A U.S. official, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said the ultimate decision on their release will be made by the Iraqi authorities.

Warnings about Saddam’s experts
The survey group also provided warnings.

The addenda conclude that Saddam’s programs created a pool of experts now available to develop and produce weapons and many will be seeking work. While most will probably turn to the “benign civil sector,” the danger remains that “hostile foreign governments, terrorists or insurgents may seek Iraqi expertise.”

“Because a single individual can advance certain WMD activities, it remains an important concern,” one addendum said.

Another addendum also noted that military forces in Iraq may continue to find small numbers of degraded chemical weapons — most likely misplaced or improperly destroyed before the 1991 Gulf War. In an insurgent’s hands, “the use of a single even ineffectual chemical weapon would likely cause more terror than deadlier conventional explosives,” another addendum said.

And still another said the survey group found some potential nuclear-related equipment was “missing from heavily damaged and looted sites.” Yet, because of the deteriorating security situation in Iraq, the survey group was unable to determine what happened to the equipment, which also had alternate civilian uses.

“Some of it probably has been sold for its scrap value. Other pieces might have been disassembled” and converted into motors or condensers, an addendum said. “Still others could have been taken intact to preserve their function.”

Small team still in place
Leaving the door to the investigation open just a crack, the U.S. official said a small team still operates under the U.S.-led multinational force in Iraq, although the survey group officially disbanded earlier this month. Those staying on continue to examine documents and follow up on any reports of weapons of mass destruction.

In a statement accompanying the final installment, Duelfer said a surprise discovery would most likely be in the biological weapons area because clues, such as the size of the facilities used to develop them, would be comparatively small.

Among unanswered questions, Duelfer said a group formed to investigate whether WMD-related material was shipped out of Iraq before the invasion wasn’t able to reach firm conclusions because the security situation limited and later halted their work. Investigators were focusing on transfers from Iraq to Syria.

No information gleaned from questioning Iraqis supported the possibility, one addendum said. The Iraq Survey Group believes “it was unlikely that an official transfer of WMD material from Iraq to Syria took place. However, ISG was unable to rule out unofficial movement of limited WMD-related materials.”

© 2005 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed.

A Useful Post: Links To Sites About Good Study Habits

2005-11-02T10:27:00.000-05:00

Time for a remotely useful post not at all related to my whininess or depression! Yay! KA-WOOT!!!

Okay. I lied.

A little.

In my research to change one of my biggest self-percieved flaws, I've done a good bit of research on solving one of them over the last few days: the development of good study habits. There's a lot of it out there. A good bit of it is crap, I won't lie. A lot of it is trying to sell you stuff. And let's be realistic about things for a second. If you're like me, a student who really needs this material, you probably can't afford to spend the $19.95, $29.95, and even $39.95 that a lot of people want for these materials.

That's why I'm presenting you this free material for the low, low price of $99.95!!!

HA! Just Kidding! You should have seen the look on your face!

Seriously, here are a few big ones you might be interested in.

First up are basic studying tips from Collegeboard.com . It'll take you a second to read through and they really make sense. The book they also sell is worth it (I have a friend who attests to this and he's an A+ STUDENT), but once again, that's if you have the money to spend on it.

Next is a short page from EHow.com . The site is short and repeats some of the information posted on the previous site. Its also geared more towards parents trying to encourage their teenagers to develop and maintain good study habits. Still, it is something good to look at and reinforce those core ideas about good studying.

Last is a site from Virginia Tech Division of Student Affairs . This is an extensive and well organized site, with detailed sections on time management, note-taking, and creating a study environment. This site is one that you definitely have to check out. If you take my word on nothing else, at least take my word on this.

I hope this has been some help to you. Let me know if it has been. See you all tommorrow.

Hitting On Old Chords: Pondering My Redescent Into Depression and Self-Perceived Flaws and Ideas For Cures

2005-11-01T16:01:00.000-05:00

Things were really compounded yesterday. My average has dropped from 3.07 down to 2.87 and I have subsequently lost my "Good Student" discount for my car insurance, causing an approximate $40 per month increase.

Another brick in the wall, and another one against my head. For the last few weeks I've been unable to focus. My mind is constantly wandering. I can't really seem to get anything done. I can't relax. It feels like the walls are closing in sometimes. And the only thing really worse than all that: sometimes I genuinely DO NOT CARE! I never, even at my worst, was genuinely apathetic. But its hit that point: most of the times I don't really care about others or even myself. Sure, I don't think my friends are catching on that much because I usually feign it so well.

I can't even get distracted from the sinking feeling at all. Hanging out with my friends doesn't help. Drinking doesn't really do anything but dull my reflexes and I don't get any genuine sort of pleasure from it at all. I don't think I'm even going to drink on social occassions anymore. The drinking most certainly hasn't helped my climb out of the abyss of depression.

But why is it that I'm feeling this way? I think it really is that the handful of self-perceived flaws are holding me back from becoming that better person that I want to be. They hold me back from accomplshing the things that I want to do. But what are those flaws?

My apathy. It seems kind of circular, but my apathy seems to be fueled by this new level of depression which is itself only further aided by the aforementioned apathy.

My decline of discipline and routine. I used to lead a very regimented life, scheduled to get in the things I had to and a few things I wanted to with enough spare time to hang out and relax otherwise. I made myself study. I made myself work out. I made myself practice drawing. Now it seems the only thing I make myself do is wake up in the mornings, and some days that becomes a rather questionable persuit.

But what can I do about these things? It seems so hard to overcome sometimes, because when I ask for help from my family, I get ignored and my ideas pushed off completely; their apathy pushing my apathy further along. It would certainly be easier if I could move out and get away. Alas, I am not financially well-off enough to move out on my own at the moment. I guess I'm going to have to try and sit everyone down and talk to them. Throw it all out on the table, let the chips fall where they may, and shed whatever tears may arise. I mean, it really is not an environment conducive to positive attitudes and behaviors, and mine being the only apparent desire to change it ultimately seems to only continue farther down a vicious spiral of apathy and negativity. If they won't help me, I'll have to change the environment on my own, because if things are going to change, I am going to need a relatively stable and constant area to study and draw. And they are going to recognize that when I need to study and I say "tell them I'm not there" when someone calls on the phone that I probably do not want / need to be disturbed and that maybe they shouldn't shove the phone up to my ear or wake me up if I'm asleep.

Sorry, I had to vent again. I'm sure that this didn't do anything for you, but it was a much needed and clarifying experience for me. Thanks for the ear. I promise my next post will be a lot more informative than this one.

I Give Up On Trying To Get It...

2005-10-31T12:58:00.000-05:00

I will never understand why people who seem to be as smart as Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, and Neal Boortz can be so mind-bogglingly blind to the things going on around them. Especially when they lay heavy claims to intellectual integrity and honesty (something Mr. Hannity talks about ad nauseum on his radio show) cannot do, or rather will not do and admit that even a most minor and casual level of research can debunk the majority of their shallow views.

Love the government. They're only doing it to protect you. They can do no wrong...blah, blah, blah.

Okay, maybe they're not that shallow. I mean, after all, they do have some differences with the president and the party line. They're potato-chip kind-of-guys, and the president is a pretzel man. (*Snicker* Sorry, couldn't resist that one.) And I can almost understand why Sean and Rush are like that. I'm sure Rush stays so doped up he has trouble remembering what order the initials in "EIB" go in and Hannity is so blinded by the reflection from his enormous forehead and chin he can't see what's in front of him, but... Neal Boortz honestly surprises me.

You can listen to Neal and tell that he really is that smart. He sounds smarter and more experienced than Sean and Rush. But he can turn around and say some of the most mentally-defecient things that you will ever hear, and when you hear him say it you have more of a "What the heck?!?!?" moment than you would if Limbaugh or Hannity said it. I just don't get it. Sooooo many people as smart as these guys ... hell, even people relatively dumb as a sack of hammers can do the research to see the truth, to see why the Bush needs to be trimmed.

I just don't get it. Maybe its time to move on and get another rant.

Hitting That Funky Depression Vibe Again

2005-10-28T21:00:00.000-05:00

You may or my not have noticed, but... no post yesterday. Yep. But... I'm sliding into depression. Nothing major, but just a minor funk. I realize that I'm letting too many things that I really have no control over. An old friend (or rather, an old high-school crush) having trouble with the douche-bag known as her child's father who she is getting a divorce from (or may have already gotten a divorce from, I forget) and is seeing other guys, my mom who may or may not lose her job due to the plant she works at closing some time between the next one-to-three years.

I was hoping to actually hoping to get to go out of town with some friends to a Haloween party and get really drunk at least forget for a little while, but they all went out of town at 6 o'clock and I didn't get off from work till 8. And not trusting my pickup to make it anywhere out of the county under its own steam, there went the jaegar-induced temporary amnesia.

And that's almost something else on its own to get down about. The fact that now I'm almost hurt that I missed an opportunity to become chemically-dependant, knowing full well that I've got family history of it on both sides. And yes, I do in fact think that people can be genetically predisposed to chemical dependancies. S'a fact. Go look it up.

O, and let's couple with all this the fact that I just heard that while my brother (who is in the school band) had his car broken into while they were playing at a football game. I don't know why. Apparently nothing was stolen, so I'm thinking random acts of vandalism from fans of the loser team. To be completely crass for a moment, but what the god-damn hell is the fucking world coming to that it makes sense to somebody to go randomly break into a bunch of cars because their football team is a bunch of damn losers!!!! AAARRGGHHH!!!

Forgive me, for taking the lord's name in vain and for being so vulgar for a moment. its just been that kind of week / month / life. Well, I'm going to try to enjoy the rest of my night and chill out as much as I can the rest of the weekend. It looks like it'll be my last chance to do so for quite some time.

Later all. And thanks for listening to my whining.

Differing Opinions On The State Of The War

2005-10-26T12:27:00.000-05:00

Look at the heading of my blog. It says that I don't think I know everything, but am pretty sure that everyone else doesn't know nearly as much as they think they do. And its true for the most part. But I am only human, and I do occassionally succumb to the beast of arrogance, and I think I might have just done that.

A few minutes ago I just posted a response to a fellow blogger's post about the war. He had a point that we really need to get away from the labeling and balming side of things and just focus on affecting the beneficial changes that our country needs. But I did not agree with his insinuations that there is no concrete proof about dileberate misleadings concerning the WMDs. There is proof cited everywhere that is not the conservative / liberal controlled mainstream media.

I'll tell you right now that I don't know if the mainstream is controlled by liberals or neo-cons. They both throw too much crap around for my tastes.

You Know, The Funniest Thing Happened Today...

2005-10-25T17:34:00.000-05:00

And it really is kinda funny too. I know you hear that a lot, but bear with me a sec. You'll love this. Its sooooo good its got to be fattening!

Now keep in mind that this is a rather cramped hallway that intersects 3 classrooms and 3 instructor rooms. Only one instructor was around at the moment.

Okay, I show up 15 minutes early for class, sit my books down and walk around for a second. I step back over to the classroom door and try to open it. Crap, it's locked. I fume for a second and decided to chew a piece of gum while I wait. I reach into my pocket, pull out the pack and ***bweew*** everything goes black.

CRAP!!!

Apparently not paying attention my elbow had bumped the master shutoff switch for power in our part of the building. The one instructor in his room at the moment comes out... kind of laughing.

"You hit it, didn't you?"

"..."

"Thought so. C'mon, let's find comeone with a key."

Now, neither of us knows why they have the breakers for that switch in a completely different part of the building or why the thing is still even up to begin with. So we go ask around and finally find someone with a key to the room where the box is (the gentleman who just so happens to be the instructor for the 5 o'clock class I was waiting to start), but he didn't have a key to the fence around it. We found an instructor in the automotive department with a key to fence to let us in.

The room is a scary sight and hums like you wouldn't believe. We find a big honkin' fuse box with breakers and whatnot the size of my fist and look around. We find one breaker that looks like it may have been tripped, so we try to raise another faculty member familiat with the electrics to confirm we're looking at the right breaker, and not something left off to prevent the building from catching fire or something. While the instructor who found me in the hall when the lights went out makes a call, I stepped outside with my teacher and he started smoking while talking about this being another thing in the already bad day he was having.

Keep in mind two things. My teacher had just lit one up. Its also about 15 minutes after class was supposed to start.

The instructor on the phone comes out and reminds us of this. My teacher rubs his cigarette out on the ground and runs off to make sure nobody leaves and to remind everyone that class is, in fact, still on. The other instructor gets confirmation that we're looking at the right breaker, resets it, and I run on ahead and made sure that everything was working. Yep, as I stepped back into the building and the computer labs were rebooting themselves.

So for those of you who were having a bad day, I hope this at least made it a little better.

After all, if we can't laugh at ourselves, who can we laugh at?
(I'm tired of laughing at Bush!)

Cleaning Up The Ol' Drawing Table: Back to Working On My Personal Projects

2005-10-24T21:52:00.000-05:00

I've always got a plethora of personal projects going on at one time. Most of the times they get started and never really see the light of day and get past that initial conception stage. Drawings, roleplaying game stuff... and a whole lot more than I can even remember.

So over the last few days I've been going back over everything on my plate so to speak and clearing it off... just throwing away everything that I know I will never get around to or have lost complete and utter intrest in.

So now I am down to my three big projects: new comic pages for my portfolio, a flash cartoon my brother and I are working on for a contest, and my own campaign setting for Dungeons and Dragons. The cartoon is a new thing, the other two are me trying to get back on track with old projects.

My biggest step towards one of these projects was yesterday when I completed a prestige class for my campaign setting: the Planar Sentry. Basically its combat-oriented class meant to take on outsiders and extrplanar entities. Right now its a 5-level class, with a Smite Outsider at each level and another ability at almost every level. Honestly, it seems a little broken to me. I'm likely to revise the number of smites per day and how one of their other abilities works. Shhhhhh... its a secret. Suffice it to say, there's another thing or two I'd like to add in there, so I might actually expand the class to a 10-level class.

Minor Change in Posting Policy

2005-10-24T21:45:00.000-05:00

Okay, one minor change in posting policies. As my weekend is usually filled with the bulk of my study time and the little bit of time I get for personal projects and / or a social life, I will not be doing daily posts on Saturday and Sunday.

I will continue to do daily posts on Monday thru Friday, and additional posts as news comes up that I see fit to point out to others, like what I did a few weeks ago with the rave in Utah and all that.

Later all.

Looking Forward To A New Drawing Experience

2005-10-20T11:25:00.000-05:00

Great news, all. After talking to the drafting instructor at the tech college I'm attending, she managed to hook me up with a catalog for drafting supplies that she uses in her class, and thanks to that, I've been introduced to something I've been looking for for a very long time: a steady supply of non-repro blue lead!

KA-WOOT!!!

For those of you who do not know, comic book pencilers usually do their layouts and initial sketches in a non-repro blue lead. Usually they are easier to erase and are not reproduced by most scanners and copiers, hence the "non-repro" part of the name.

There's only one catch tho; they're professional drafting leads. I've had no experience with sharpening the darn things once they begin to lose their points and whatnot. It's going to be a new experience. I'll let you know how it all goes.

P.S. I'm going to start compiling a list of links to the stupidest people on the internet and in the media. I'll give you a hint on a few of the names. One starts with "S" and ends in "ean Hannity." Another starts with "R" and ends in "ush Limbaugh." You see where I'm going with this, right? Well, perhaps "stupid" might be an inappropriate label. After all, most of them are "relatively" smart and over-tout the merits of their own "intellectual honesty" (Mr. Hannity, I'm looking at you...), but they are blindly biased and moreover are trying to inflict that bias on others. Not only is that stupid, but its a tad hurtful to us as a society, no?

Make-Up Post 5: Tuesday: Thinking About My Comic Book Concept More

2005-10-19T11:57:00.000-05:00

Remember waaaaay back when I talked about my pseudo-Christian comic book idea basically about a robot and an amazon-esque primal woman called "A.D.A.M and Eve" and promised to post some of my prototype pix up, and never did.

Well, there's a reason for that.

I'm growing a little reluctant about the concept alltogether. Don't get me wrong. I'd like to do the android / woman love story right, and I think I could. Its just that some of the storyline ideas I had for the book seemed like they might be a little dark. Dark to the point that many more fundamental Christians might find it to be a little too offensive. I'm not scared of fighting the Southern Baptists or anything. I've been getting on their nerves and them on mine for quite some time now. Its just that I'm biding my time 'till I get things so concretely put together that I can hopefully present some of it in a non-blasphemous light.

Make-Up Post 4: Sunday: Moment of Self-Realization

2005-10-19T11:42:00.000-05:00

I woke up this morning and realized that... I really am declining from the person I want to be.

The last few weeks, I've been staying up late all the time and waking up late in the morning, my schedual usually putting me going to sleep around 1:00 a.m. or so and getting up at about 11:00 a.m. a scant 3 hours before my first class of the day. It really gets on my nerves because I've missed a good bit of gym time the last week and I'm kicking myself because of it.

And that's when I realized one of the big things that's changed about me is that I am not nearly as self-disciplined as I used to be. Its a big thing that I need to work on. So tonight, screw the world. After I get off from work at 8:30, I'm going home, getting a wee bit of study time and play time in, then I'm hitting the hay at 10:30. I'll let you know how that all works out.

Make-Up Post 3: Saturday: Teaching Seems To Be The Best Way To Learn

2005-10-19T11:39:00.000-05:00

Yesterday I was treated to an unique experience. A classmate of mine offered to help explain a problem we both were having trouble with to me. I was so taken aback that I sat there and let him run with it. And I have to admit I was impressed.

We were looking at issues with supernetting and route summarization and as he sat there explaining the problem from one of our tests to me. He would stop for a few moments, like he'd get stuck because he was really doubting his grasp of it. But he'd eventually get focused again and get back to the point. Overall, he really did help shed some light on things from me, and I was glad he did.

He really is smart, but he doubts himself too much. And when he's speaking, you can really see it. When he has a firm grasp on things, he just kind of blurts it out and it usually is the right answer.

And I could tell that when he was trying to teach the process to me, he was helping himself really to further understand it. So I really hope that he can learn to get over those moments of self-doubt.

Make-Up Posts 2: Friday: Quick-Growing Collagen: Just Remove Water!

2005-10-17T13:39:00.000-05:00

According to a BBC News report today, a team at the University College London has discovered a way to accellerate tissue generation via the removal of water from the starting material. Typically the process of creating specimens for skin grafts and whatnot runs between one and twelve weeks. There is speculation that this could accellerate the process greatly.

This technique, called plastic compression allowed for the creation of collagen in under a half an hour. This is great news for surgeons and patients everywhere, allowing for speed and effeciency unheard of and the creation of tissue at the bedside or in the operating theater.

This is definitely something for everyone to keep their ears to the ground for further news on.

Make-Up Posts 1: Thursday: Holy Immense IP Iterations, Batman!

2005-10-17T11:09:00.000-05:00

This might seem a little strange for someone who plans to be immersed in the world of high-tech, but maybe, just maybe we don't need to be growing as big or as fast as we are doing now. Surprisingly enough, the thing that really has got me thinking about this is the concept of subnetting.

I just heard the brains of everyone not into networking shut down for a second. Don't worry, you don't need to know much about it, but here's a quick synopsis.

In orders for computers to talk to each other on a network, they need to have an IP address. But you might only want one set of computers to be able to talk to another set of computers, so you might put them on a different subnet(work) from the other computers they shouldn't talk to. Now IP addresses are ultimately the mailing system of the internet with the IP address saying that this bit of information needs to go here, and vice-versa. This means that each seperate network has to have its own IP address.... and so on. You get the general idea, right?

Now we're on IPv4. The IP address is 4 decimal octets whose values can range from 0 to 255. There are 4,294,967,296 unique addresses and we're running out fast. Thanks to subnetting, supernetting and other networking technologies, we are able to conserve addresses and essentially allow duplicate addresses on private networks that might match other unattached networks' addresses. Anyway... sounds like a lot doesn't it?

IPv6, however, will be a brand new beast. It will be a 128-bit addressing scheme composed of 32 hexadecimal characters (that's right, base-16!!!). The result: 430 quintillion (4.3 × 10²⁰) unique addresses per square inch, or 670 quadrillion (6.7 × 10¹⁷) per square millimeter, of the Earth's surface. To get a grasp of these numbers, please follow the links to Wikipedia, which has a great explanation on these large numbers. Also, for a more comprehensive explanation on IPv6 itself, please check out the Wikipedia link here.

What could we possibly need this many addresses for? I'm not sure, honestly. Even if you were to slap a computer and cell-phone in the hands of every living person on the face of the planet, one office computer per government official, one per computer per corporate officer, and toss in an additional one per every person on the planet, we're still only really hitting the 20 billion or so mark.

If you listen to the alternative media which I encourage you to do (and occassionally the mainstream media), you will hear talk about implanting RFID chips into people for tracking purposes. Yes, I do believe its coming. Yes, I do believe it will likely be against our will. But think about it... that many unique IP addresses, that many RFID chips.... it'll make things pretty easy to route and / or track all that movement and data.

I'm not trying to scare people, but it's something to think about.

It Was A Busy Weekend...

2005-10-17T10:48:00.000-05:00

But I'm gonna make up for the missing posts. Today. I promise.

I'd rather not say exactly why I was so busy this weekend, just suffice it to say that most reasons were family-related and the others... well, that's just between me and the concerned parties at the moment.

I was actually working on a large post since Thursday night, but didn't get to post it because of class. That, however, will be taken care of today.

Anyway, have fun with today's Make-Up Posts!

I've Been Thinking Again... No Wonder My Head Hurts!

2005-10-12T21:52:00.000-05:00

But seriously...

The state of American politics really has me troubled. I can't help but to be shocked and dismayed by the complete and utter disregard that our politicians have for the laws and protocols they would have us follow. The corruption has hit the point to where it is almost absolute (surely you remember that old adage about power corrupting...). And the saddest part about it is that we let them get away with it!!! Especially the Bush crony-ism!!! What is it with this man appointing grossly underqualified to positions of power within his administration???

The man can't have lost his mind... because I'm not entirely sure he was in full possession of his mental faculties to begin with.

But surely we as a country have taken leave of our most basic senses.

Instead of merely crying out in outrage and listening to the media reminding us of how outraged we tell each other we are, its time to get out to the ballot-boxes and remind the politicians who really is in charge and who, at the end of the day, really signs the checks!

Now that I'm thinking about it, maybe in the future we'll explore the illegalities of the current income tax system.

Young Avengers Have Renewed My Faith In Marvel Comics: And A Partial Apology To Mr. Howard Chaykin

2005-10-11T12:07:00.000-05:00

Last night I re-read the latest issue of Young Avengers (issue #7 to be specific), and something occurred to me: Howard Chaykin (famed comic book writer / artist I got a chance to meet at this past DragonCon) was right about something: Marvel Comics may still very well be the "House of Ideas" (a label it has hoarded away to itself for many years now).

So to Mr. Howard Chaykin. You can count yourself among the honored number of 26 people I have ever admited this to. If I ever run into you again, the drinks are on me!

You were right.

I was wrong.

Kind of.

Specifically, Marvel Comics still does occassionally let new and great ideas burst through the slew of X-Books we have to wade through month after month.

The Young Avengers (as well as their New Avengers counterpart) is a very fresh and interesting title that I've got to encourage everyone to read. In the current 7 issues to date, they have picked up the tatters left from the Avengers Dissassembled storyline of last year and strove to help pick up the slack of the heroes they thought lost to the world. Gathered by Iron Lad (who was revealed to be a young version of Kang the Conqueror), the first few members known as Patriot, Asgardian, and Hulkling were all supposed to have some sort of ties to the Avengers of old (just not in the obvious ways as some would think). Patriot was revealed to be the Grandson of the ORIGINAL BLACK Captain America who recieved an infusion of blood from his grandfather and apparently some of the super-soldier serum along with it. No connection has really been revealed about Hulkling and Asgardian other than the fact that Asgardian has absolutely nothing to do with Thor or the gods of Asgard. His powers are magic of some sort.

Their first mission led them to break up a hostage situation at a church where they ran into the girl who would end up becoming their next member, "Hawkingbird." Now the adult Avengers track down the teens and try and dissuade them from persuing their course of action and Scott Lang's daughter shows up to reclain some of her father's possessions, and it is revealed that she has developed growing / shrinking powers from the Pym Particles she had been "borrowing" from her father (without his knowledge) over the course of his career. Kang shows up, intent on reclaiming his younger self and his armor, neither of which the Young Avengers seem intent on giving up. Engaging in a battle during which the older Avengers become incapacitated, its up to the young new heroes to stop Kang and set things right. The do succeed in ultimately killing the older Kang, but they do have to send their friend Iron Lad back to his home in the future to become the man he despised and sought to flee from. The armor, however remains in our time inhabited by essentially a teen-version of the Vision, since the young Kang used his OS to help run his armor and information to gather up the Young Avengers to begin with.

Still, once the old Avengers revive, they continue to threaten the teens to abandon their costumes and gear and return home or they were going to out the children to their relatives. They leave the outfits, but thanks to the resources of "Hawkingbird's" father's fortune, they soon have an abandoned warehouse HQ of their own as well as new gear. Once they re-emerge, they decide to try and "come out to their parents," in hopes of beating Captain America to the punch. This ends in Giant-Girl leaving her house to meet her friends in a fit of rage after hearing her step-father speak very poorly of her, and Hulkling and Warlock (formerly Asgardian) come out to Warlock's parents and are officially accepted... as a gay couple. Not a bad thing, but not what they were going for. There is also the tragic and yet very emotional moment between Patriot and his grandfather. No words said, just a tear of joy and a smile on his face as he thinks his grandson might be following in a set of steps to help make the world a better place for mankind.

With Patriot running very late for his meeting with the others, Warlock uses a spell to locate him where he has apparently tracked down a group of drug dealers led by Mr. Hyde. This goes back earlier to an encounter Patriot had with several sellers of MGH (Mutant Growth Hormone), a drug that temporarily induces super-powers in normal humans. Everyone engages in battle with Mr. Hyde while Warlock tends to Patriot, noticing his wounds are not closing and wondering what happend to his powers. In a fit of rage, Patriot runs off with Warlock in persuit. When he finds his friend, however, he's shooting up like a junkie. (Shades of 70's Speedy, no?)

End issue 7.

In 7 issues, they have managed to have a better witten, better managed, and less confusing storyline than most other mainstream superhero comics over the last 5 or 6 years, while still referencing a great amount of untapped background story not really used before. Don't get me wrong. Marvel still has more X-Titles than there probably should be in circulation, and Iron Man has been outed and gone back into the closet (in an open-secret identity sense) over the last few years than I would care to remember, and let's not even talk about Spider-Man. Its kind of like what caused the formation of Image Comics years ago. No matter how great writers and artist may be, there is only so much they can do with characters with far too much back-story and continuity issues. But if this shows nothing else, it shows that maybe if Marvel can step away from the same old stale characters and stories being repeated ad infinitum over the last 20+ years, they really can become the "House of Ideas" once again.

Excelsior, true believer!

Week-Long Hiatus: O How You Must Hate Us!

2005-10-09T23:18:00.000-05:00

I know that I said once a few weeks ago that I would do a daily post, even if no more than a "Hi, I'm not quite dead yet" kind of thing. And yet, I did not for the entire duration of the last week. I guess it just shows absolutely nobody is truly reliable when it really comes down to it.

Especially bloggers. As much as I hate to say it, bloggers are almost as unreliable as *gasp* the mainstream media! Yes, as hard as it might be to believe we're almost as unreliable as say.... Neal Boortz, Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, and Bill O'Reilly. You need to keep a few things in mind, however.

Unlike the mainstream media, we bloggers admit that, while many of us do in fact consider ourselves to be reporters of a sort, we are still giving you our opinion with the news in question. Many of the other morons in the mainstream media however do not. They think that just because they are so damn smart and special that what they think must be fact and not opinion since they are the ones thinking it.

And I'm sure that if these statements were to come to their attention, they would be dismissed as the casual ramblings of another arrogant youth. At that I would remind them to read the header of my blog. I believe that statement sums it up rather accurately. One thing I got used to a long time ago is that I do not know everything. I am not as smart as others believe me to be. I am smart enough to realize that I will never know everything I should or everything I would like to.

I do, however, know one immutable truth. When it really comes down to it, age does not equate to knowledge or wisdom, nor does youth imply a lack of either. Stupidity is without bounds.

Today I renew my promise. Daily posts...not quite dead yet... blah, blah, blah.

We'll see how long it lasts this time.

Not Everyone Will Like Everything... So Quit Forcing The Subject!

2005-10-03T14:48:00.000-05:00

One of the many things I am tired of is people trying to convince me that something I should enjoy something I don't like. Don't get me wrong. I can admit that things I don't like may in fact still be good. Here are a few examples.

I do not personally like Firefly. Its just not my Whedon-ized cup of tea. But I can admit that it is a good, quality show and I see why people like it. Its just not for me.

Another example: Curb Your Entheusiasm. To me, its just not funny. Its not that I don't get it. I'm not anti-semitic. Heck, I really like Seinfeld, another show Larry David worked on. Seinfeld I liked. Curb Your Entheusiasm... not so much. I hate to say it... and I'm sure I'll catch heck at some time in the future for it, but its not funny. This one I do not understand what my brother sees in it.

This is why I don't expect people to like what I like for the most part. See, to me, Transformers the Movie is the greatest cinematic masterpiece ever concieved. I can explain to others why I like it, but all the same, I do not expect everyone else to "get it."

Its the same way with people's personal views as well. You can express them all you want, as I do. In fact, I encourage everyone to do so. Variety and differences are the spices of life. Just don't expect everyone else to "get it," and certainly don't try and force others to do so.

Sony: Open Sphincter, Insert Stick.... Or Why The Corporate Monolith Should Unclench...

2005-09-30T17:53:00.000-05:00

Within days of the downgrade of 2.0 to 1.5 being released, Sony has announced another update. As a deliberate counter to the possibility of running homebrewed software on the PSP, this new update is specifically for plugging the programming holes that allow the downgrading procedure.

Sony says that this is to prevent unintended use of the equipment and that running homebrewed software on the PSP invalidates one's warranty.

And I say SO WHAT SONY!!!

Consider: once one purchases a system, especially at the price that this nice, hefty lil' hunk of hardware with a battery life worse than my truck with the lights left on while I go in to get another set of batteries for my t.v. remotes, they have the right to do whatever the please with that piece of hardware, so long as it does not result in illegal activities. Certainly this is not activity intended by Sony and should in fact invalidate the warranty. I can accept that, and ultimately I think that anyone who wants to run this risk by using homemade software should accept it.

But really, getting this... well, almost juvenile and pugilistic about it... does not seem to show you guys as being the unworried, monolithic, corporate powerhouse that you percieve yourselves as. There are so many possibilities for squeezing so much more functionality out of such a versatile machine, why work hard to shut down these avenues of ingenuity that could result in more PSP units being sold? It seems like an almost smarter business standpoint to claim to be trying close these holes and really just leave them open than getting almost violent about it.

I could guarantee beyond the shadow of any doubt that once something like the PSP could be shown to have as many practical applications as entertainment uses, I'm sure that many more units would be sold. Heck, you go as far as to throw in a battery that will last longer than an asthmatic smoking marathon-runner and you'd have the perfect hand-held machine.

PSP Firmware Downgrade: 2.0 to 1.5 has been achieved!!!

2005-09-29T15:08:00.000-05:00

To all those as interested in utilizing homebrew software on your PSP as I am, you might want to check out this link:

http://www.afterdawn.com/guides/archive/downgrade_psp_2.cfm

I have regreted it ever since I accidentally upgraded my firmware to 1.52 and now it seems possible to downgrade to 1.5 without bricking your PSP! With many successessful reports of following this procedure, I plan on downgrading my PSP later this evening. I'll give a report on it later tonight or tomorrow morning and let everyone know how it went.

The Progressive Dumbing Down of Education

2005-09-27T15:51:00.000-05:00

It really is amazing what people don't know anymore.

This statement is not generation-specific, however. I see this in the kids of today, my parents think that about my generation, my parents' parents believe that about them, and so on. I'm not going to be mean and say that it stands to reason that as time goes on, naturally, there will be more things to be known. And there will ultimately be noone able to know it all. That stands to reason, and I'm not going to beat that dead horse. It would be a non-issue of sorts.

What troubles me, really, is the quality of today's teachers (or lack thereof). I know in Georgia in particular that teachers are in especially short supply for the relative demand. To compensate for this, the standards on what it takes to be a teacher have been lowered, and only compounds the lack of quality teaching. No student should ever walk into a classroom and feel like "Man, I know more than the teacher." Even though these standards are being ratcheted back up, its still a long way back up.

Another thing that has shot the quality of education in the foot is our illustrious leader's "No Child Left Behind" nonsense that has become more of a hinderance than a help. Sounds like "par for the course" for our president. Out of the teachers that I have ever talked to, all it results in is yet more standardized testing that teachers have hve to worry about helping their pupils prepare for and detracts from genuine teaching and learning (for those instructors capable of doing such).

Much of my experience is limited strictly to Georgia, but there is evidence of such problems all over the country. No wonder Georgia is one of the states with the lowest collective SAT scores. No wonder America is producing less and less scientist and engineers thn other countries. We're getting worse and worse in the areas of math and science especially. I guess everyone in America is going to be a millionaire or pop-star and Japan is going to design our TVs and equipment.

Limbaugh: Evil Or Hypocrite...? Or Just Plain Off His Nut!?!

2005-09-26T19:35:00.000-05:00

On my way back home this afternoon, I did something I usually try and avoid: listen to Rush Limbaugh. Now, I do not think he is evil per se, so let's avoid the frivilous attempts at suing me for slander. But even regularly listening fans of Rush have to admit that this man is obviously a little off-kilter at the very least.

I'll avoid mentioning all the stuff pertaining to his hypocritical drug scandal. That is one horse that really has been beaten into the ground. Oh, and concerning that, yes, I do in fact think that Rush Limbaugh is a Janus-styled two-faced hypocrite.

But evil... I can't really say that I've known or heard of Rush doing anything evil. After all, that would imply doing something and Rush Limbaugh really isn't going to do anything more than talk. I've noticed for much of the last year or so he keeps refferring to Guantanamo Bay / Gitmo as "Club Gitmo," trying to downplay a lot of what goes on there. Wether or not you think everyone that's there needs to be there... let's set that aside for the moment. To hear him describe it, its a country club resort for everyone there, so it sounds like a place one would want to go on vacation. And obviously if Rush has been so stressed during recent years that he has resorted to the drug use which he has so condemned for many years, he obviously needs a vacation. I personally want to see Rush Limbaugh do time behind bars at "Club Gitmo" wearing one of those damn shirts of his. Heck, I would like to see or hear him do something other than sit behind his "glorious EIB mike" and sit in his "Genghis-Kahn throne." And this is no exaggeration. I did hear him refer to his "Genghis-Kahn throne" on air today and he has never shut up about his "Golden (Idol) EIB Mike." All I have to say is if they are going to poke fun at a place where people are detained for prolonged periods without trial and interrogated with questionable methods, maybe they aren't so damn excellent after all.

Just a little something for all you "neo-cons" to think about. You might want to choose another label too. "Neo-Con" sounds like a new Hasbro gimmick for the "Transformers" toy line to me.

Theoretical Theology

2005-09-25T18:19:00.000-05:00

As I have said before many times, I consider myself to be a Christian. I am not, however, religious. To me, being religious carries with it implications of blind adherance to the rhetoric of others. As you can imagine, when I try to explain this to others (considering I live below the "bible-belt) I tend to get in a little bit of trouble.

But think for a second, for the most part when you go to church, you are listening to someone else read to you and give you their interpretation on what it is they are reading. A lot of times, from my own experience, they are telling you what they think something is because "it just is that way" since they were told it was that way as a child, in bible college by their instructors, and so on. Rarely do many preachers seem to be scholarly enough to do their own research and try to reach their own conclusions or, at very least, reaffirm that in which they already believe.

That is why I don't go to church unless I'm invited to a wedding or funeral. I am not saying you shouldn't go to church if you feel like you get something from it. I just don't get any spiritual sustenance from the experience, because when I sit in front of some preachers, it doesn't seem like what they are telling me comes from heart and honest faith, but from memory and rehearsal.

Earlier this year one of the few preachers... I should say teachers rather, died on my birthday. Doctor Eugene Scott. If you get a chance to read or listen to any of his work, you really should. It wasn't until I began listening to him a few years ago that my faith became renewed and I began, albeit slowly to do my own research into the bible as well as metaphysics and the occult. I think what did it for me was that teacher attitude and his scholarly mannerisms. He spoke and it didn't feel like sitting in front of a recording being replayed.

That's why on Sunday, the one day of the week I ever seem to get any real reading and study in, I say my prayers, meditate, and think the thoughts that usually escape me.

4-Day Weekend Forecast For Georgia Students: Partly Sunny With A Chance Of Tragedy...

2005-09-23T15:40:00.000-05:00

I was just informed by my brother that his principal at the high-school announced over the intercom this afternoon that, due to the forcasted rise in gas prices next week, school would be cancelled for next Monday and Tuesday. This announcement came down from Governor Perdue himself earlier this afternoon.

The students of course rejoiced at the thought of a four-day weekend, for whatever reason. Back when I was that age and in high-school, I would have as well.

I just implore that the students remember the cause for those extra days off.

The hurricanes.

The people driven from house and home.

The people whose lives will ultimately be lost to this weather-based tragedy.

And the economic strain this country will feel in the immediate months to come, and the reprecussions that will still be felt years down the road.

Real Life Caught Me Again... But I'm Free!

2005-09-22T20:49:00.000-05:00

I know I said it before, but I swear, at least one daily update in the future! I hope.

I'm not going to lie about it. Between my written and hands-on final for my Cisco class, helping out others with their problems, and looking into a part-time job, its tough to keep my head above water. When you throw on top of that trying to sneak in a little time for relaxation and my creative persuits, its no wonder that you haven't heard from me in over a week.

I apologize.

It won't happen again unless there's an emergency.

That said, time to move on to another subject.

The rash of hurricanes.

This really has been one heck of a year for hurricanes. After Huricane Katrina had its way with the Gulf Coast, we're already up to the "R's" in our naming scheme as Hurricane Rita bears down on Texas like its waiting to get paid. What is it with female-named hurricanes and the Gulf Coast? I didn't mean to say that they're only doing it because they had female names, but ...

There's already talking about Rita being a full-on "national disaster" and I've got to tell you, there is no way it will be anything less. I've already stocked up on gas and plan on keeping my tank filled until next week. Gas in my area is predicted to hit the $4.20 a gallon mark by this time next week. Note: I am not trying to scare people into a last minute rush and riot at the pumps. I am not trying to fearmonger people into buying more fuel. I am merely informing you as to what I have heard and stating that I plan on trying to be prepared. This time, with so many more oil platforms and processing facilities in Texas being out of commission, I understand a sizable jump, but I don't like it. I also don't think it really should be quite that high. I will admit that I only have an Associate's Degree in Business Administration and have not had a chance to do nearly as much research into this as the talented economists that appear on CNN and typically thumb their noses at anyone in a less-expensive suit than their own. I personally think that $3.80 a gallon, while still a very steep price, is more reasonable than $4.20 a gallon.

And to those people in other countries who are tired of hearing Americans "whine every time gas jumps," I have two words for you.

Bite.

Me.

He's Big, But Not Blue, But He's BACK!

2005-09-13T12:37:00.000-05:00

Sorry to my... I don't know... 17 readers for my absence for the last week. I'm not going to lie. I was depressed and had a lot to do, so the few minutes I had to update I really just didn't feel like it.

But I'm all better now. Honest. I've worked through the issues I had, and I'm back, better than ever. But a few things are going to change about the blog so just bear with me a minute while I outline the changes.

Firstly, all previous weekly or twice-weekly columns are off. Anything that would have been addressed in them will be addressed in regular posts. I might do regular column-series, or specials, but the others are off for now.

Second, I will do a daily post. Honest. Some days it might not be much more than a "Hi. Still here, not dead yet" but there will be at least one post per day. May the good lord strike some bad person down if I'm lying.

Well, I've got to go for the moment. Studying for a Cisco test at the moment, but when I get back, I've got a doozy of a post about FEMA and our (impending) newest Supreme Court member.

Ciao for now.

FEMA: Feverishly Expanding Messes Always!

2005-09-06T12:35:00.000-05:00

Once again, I do not believe what I am not hearing on the mainstream news. Well, I can believe it, I just hoped that I wouldn't not be hearing it. Let me start off this post by again saying that pray for those harmed by the storm, and pray for us all.

Right now I am hearing some very alarming reports about what FEMA is doing. I have heard of three confirmed reports from Louisiana that in three parishes the local law enforcement are in gunpoint standoffs with FEMA officials, refusing to allow them in. And with some of the other reports and stories coming in from other places, I am not at all surprised.

In one area where FEMA had already taken over, three trucks donated by Wal-Mart (not a company that I'm overly fond of, but still a nce gesture) full of water were turned away saying that they were not needed. Emergency lines of communication in the area were severed. Even fuel trucks that came in were met with difficulties from FEMA. Apparently while county officials were trying to get fuel into the county, fuel lines were severed. It got to where the official ordered these lines repaired and gaurded at gunpoint by the local law enforcement which was given strict orders not to let anyone interfer with the operation of those lines under any circumstances!

And God bless him for that!

When did we become so codependent on the federal government that we would let them come in and do such blatantly harmful and stupid things? Yes, it is stupid to turn back trucks of water that in fact were needed and should have been let in. Local officials were elected to design failsafes and contigiencies for their constituents for situations such as this. I'm not saying that the government should not be allowed to help, but if their performance in this case is any indication, its going to take so long for the fed to get the military and others in to help with evacuation and repairs and whatnot.

How is it that other such hurricanes can be responded to much more expediently and efficiently, but this one, this one was handled so shoddily that I hesitate to say there was intent behind it being handled so terribly. But it really does make you wonder...

Everyone, even if you depend on CNN and Fox News for your information, I ecourage to turn to other sources. You definitely will be surprised by what you find out that you are not hearing about.

As always, think for yourself, judge for yourself, but look out for each other.

Dragoncononomicon: Or How I Survived The 'Con And Learned To Love Myself Again!

2005-09-05T22:49:00.000-05:00

I'm back from the 'Con and had a great time. Panel discussions and celebrities galore. A chance to enlighten myself and knock out one of those last few dykes (figuratively speaking, of course!) and tap into that long dormant creative side of myself. I'm back world, and watch out!

Now for some of the general highlights.

I'll have to admit, there were more beautiful and scantily-clad women than you could shake a stick at, and believe me, I tried. Costumes and the masquerade played a big part in this year's festivities. Some were about to bust out of their costumes, in more ways than one and not all entirely good.

There was a lot of gaming abound, but I didn't take part of it really. Like I stated, I was there mainly for the panel discussions and to meet a few celebrities. I attended a very informative panel about women in the comics industry and their impact on it, how they are represented in the subject material, and how they too are still subject to that classical glass ceiling. I also attended a similar panel about jews in comics which addressed many of the same issues as the fem panel, with the exception of the glass ceiling. I also went to an audience discussion with Howard Chaykin, one of the greatest creative minds in comics today where we got a chance to discuss some new upcoming projects, older things, and the current state of the industry. We had a bit of a disagreement about wether Marvel really is the house of ideas or is currently stagnanting in what it presents (which was my opinion. I'm sorry, but not counting the Ultimates line, a lot of Marvel really is just the same old stuf we've all been reading for the last 20 years, but I'll expand on this later), but he's still a hell of a guy. I also attended a panel about blogger's rights (which will be the subject of a singular future post).

I managed to get Marv Wolfman, another great jewish comic talent to sign a copy of History of the DC Universe and the script for Beast Machines Episode 16, Prometheus Undound ! I also got Mr. Chaykin to sign all three issues of Green Lantern: Evil's Might, one of the best DC Elseworld's titles in a long time. I also got a chance to meet Dean Haglund of X-Files and Lone Gunmen fame to autograph a pic for me. He was a very smart and funny guy.

Well, that's all for now. Just wanted to let everyone know I'm back and over the next few weeks I'll be doing some in-depth highlights of my favorite parts of the convention.

By the way, if you ran into William S. Turbos during the convention, just wanted to let you know that was me.

Later all. Think for yourself. And don't trust anything you're told. Except for that. And that. At least witout some independent research of your own.

"Dragon" My Feet: Can't Wait For Convention TIme!!!

2005-09-01T17:33:00.000-05:00

Ahhhh, it's that time of the year again. Destruction's fresh in the air, looking to get further out of my recent funk and there's only one thing that could possibly take my mind off of both, at least for a while:

DRAGONCON!!!

The big gaming / comic book convention starting from tommorrow and ending on Monday. God bless Labor Day weekend! Whereas I'm a big fan of both, I'm gonna spend the vast majority of the weekend in art and writing seminars, and if I get a chance, I'll try and sneak a little time in to get Mr. Howard Chaykin to autograph my "Green Lantern: Evil's Might" Elseworlds limited series and make a few stops in the Anime Room.

It's been a long time coming. The last time I went to DragonCon was when I was but a wee lad and got to see Captain Power. Man that was a long time ago.

By the way, for those interested, I have finally gotten back to doing some drawings. The batch I'm working on now are preliminary sketches for a comic idea I have called "A.D.A.M and Eve." Its a superhero / sci-fi story with a dash of political intrigue thrown in for good measure and yes, there will be some Christian allegory and metaphors worked in as well. Hopefully I can have a few scans of my notes and sketches up soon.

Godbless and godspeed. Try and enjoy your Labor Day weekend as much as possible, and don't forget those prayers.

Quick Updates For Those Georgia Citizens Interested...

2005-08-31T21:39:00.000-05:00

Here are a few snippetts brought to you from Channell 13 WMAZ News . Please check out the full stories at their site.

------

Hancock County Schools Closed

Governor Perdue: "Plenty of Gas"

------

With regards to the second story, I am glad to hear that the state government plans to prosecute any and all gas station owners found to be pulling the old "bait-n-switch," which in this case would be having the price posted as one number on their sign and having the actual price on the pump set at something different. The same will be done for those who unreasonably jack up their prices, or so they claim. Now let's see if they actually do it.

The reason cited for the majority of the gas issues in Georgia at the moment stems from the loss of power to the pipeline that supplies us with most of our gasoline. Hopefully it will be taken care of over the weekend and things should be a little closer to normal come next week. I'll be counting the minutes, skeptically.

I Always Thought The End Of The World Would Start Off Like This...

2005-08-31T21:17:00.000-05:00

Our country involved in a big war in one part of the world. A hurricane doing massive damage to three states. Having to almost come to fisticuffs over a tank of gas because almost all the gas stations in my home town are out and likely won't get more for some time.

Looks like I'm 3 for 3.

Man I wish I wasn't.

I'm sure its just like this all over the country. Literally overnight there was an 20 cent jump in the gas price and, apparently hearing that gas was going to be running out, everyone dashed out to fill up their tanks. I must admit that even I was not immune to this madness. I spent about $47 at 2 different stations to fill up my truck for the next week or so, doing my part to make this self-fulfilling prophecy come to pass.

Everywhere I turned just lines after lines of people waiting to get gas. Some stores had limits on how much one could purchase (the stations I went to had a $20 limit and one had a 20 gallon limit. Some places ran out in the morning even before the rush hit. Most all seem that they will not be able to get their usual orders filled. Some might not be able to get more gas for the next week. Some nearby towns in the area, Cochran and Sandersville in particular, apparently had already run dry if the any of the stories around here are to be believed. One rumor I heard that I would be greatly interested in ascertaining the veracity of is wether or not some dealers are not ordering / selling gas in protest to the prices at which they would have to order and resell to the customers at. Somehow I doubt such is the case, but in any event it would be nice to find out a definite thing one way or another.

In any event there was madness galore with some people trying to rush to the banks to withdraw enough to fill their tanks and others like myself trying to get between multiple stations to go ahead and get filled for the week. I managed to take enough time out of the insanity to drive a gentleman from one station t the car lot he worked at. Apparently the owners decided with an empending gas crunch that it would be prudent to fill up most of the company cars. Unfortunately the pick-up that this gentleman was in wouldn't start up again after he filled 'er up. So we pushed it out of the way and I took him back to the car lot to get some help. I was just glad to get my good deed for the day out of the way.

Makes me wish I could recieve the local station out where I live, but I can't even get it on my DishNetwork package. I would like to know the full extent of the "damage" in my area.

Just remember again tonight that you need to say another prayer (or whatever passes for one in whatever your religion is) for those hardest hit by the hurricane. Also say another for our economy, because if this is any indication we're all in for tough times ahead and can use all the help we can get.

"Skew"ered Like A Shrimp On The Barbie: Inaccuracies In The Mainstream Media

2005-08-30T18:55:00.000-05:00

How can you get 400 out of 40? Send it to CNN!

Just kidding.

Mostly.

One thing I've really noticed since I started to pay attention to the world around me is that the media will never have the same numbers on anything whatsoever. I'm sure I don't need to remind anyone about the voting season from back in 2000 and 2004. Not having consistent figures on the number of people missing or dead during a storm, erpecially while its going on. But when figures about the dead in and from Iraq come out, maybe these figures need to include the troops sent to other countries and medical ficilities not in the immediate battlefield area. If a man dies in a hospital in Germany because of wounds and injuries sustained in Iraq, he died as a result of the war in Iraq. Its as simple as that.

A prominent example from the last few weeks are the reports from Crawford, Texas, with regards to the goings-on with Cindy Sheehan. For starters, every single mainstream source I have seen from CNN, CBS, MSNBC, FOX (News Fair and Biased) all talk about the assemblage being pretty much 50% / 50% for and against her cause.

I haven't seen any non-mainstream source quote these same figures. What I DO keep hearing over and over again is that most of the people there are supporting her and significantly outnumber her detractors.

But there are other things about this in particular being left out, or at best barely mentioned that disturb me. The incident surrounding one of Mr. Bush's neighbors firing his gun into the air was downplayed, especially when he was asked why he did it and later responded "Figure it out yourself" (or something to that effect). But I have scarcely heard mention of the truck running over some of the 1000+ crosses erected roadside in memorial of our lost troops, and another truck driving past / through towing a pipe on a chain from the rear bumper destroying more crosses.

I'd just like you to think for a moment: why are there such discrepencies? Why are some things being plastered all over the airwaves, and others being merely glossed over? And even more importantly, who decides what is shoved in our face and what is being hidden away? And on what factors do they base their decisions?

It would probably do people good to look at the people at various ownership areas of mainstream media outlets. Look at everything they own (media or otherwise) and the people they deal with and are related to? Look for convergences and maybe you can start to figure out what it is they're up to.

At very least, I encourage people to avoid mainstream media sources such as FOX, CNN, ABC, CBS, and MSNBC for the most part. Look at the newswires directly, and even look at other countries' news publications. Many have english translations of their pages, and with those that don't, its entirely possible to run their sites through an online translation service. Over the next few days, I'm going to try and update my links list to incorporate many such sites for you to peruse at your leisure.

Once again, examine everything you read and hear thoroughly. Never take anything at face value, not even what I tell you. Read for yourself, think for yourself, and judge for yourself.

Say A Prayer For New Orleans...

2005-08-30T13:26:00.000-05:00

I dread every time a hurricane rolls around. You always fear when that time rolls around when they announce the death tools of such natural tragedies. Not just the deaths from the natural phenomena itself but from the emotional toll it takes on oneself. To hear of someone in the Superdome jumping to their death, apparently willingly, adds another layer onto it. To become that disheartened to give into total surrender when nearly 80% of the city now lies underwater is understandable, but still tragic nonetheless. Add on top of that FEMA and the Pentagon coming in to take control under martial law in these emergency areas and I am sure there will be more hurt to follow.

I realize that more than just Louisianna and New Orleans were affected by this. I just happen to have a certain soft-spot in my heart for the city.

So whatever your religion is, I ask you to say a prayer (or whatever passes for a prayer in your religion) to your God (or whatever passes for God in your religion) for those who have died because of this hurricane and to pray that no further tragedy should befall these states.

Remember to help look out for each other because sometimes we can't all look out for ourselves.

Questioning Self Part 2: Self-Denial

2005-08-26T14:58:00.000-05:00

I think one main thing that is helping slowly ease me out of my current funk is my refusal to deny myself any longer. What I mean by this is that for a very long time, the entirety of the time I have been depressed, is that I have spent a long time denying the things that I find to be quintessential to my sense of self. Denying these things has atrophied a part of my soul.

But it is a part that I feel rebuilding itself.

My depression stemmed from many sources. More, in fact, than I am sure that I am truly aware of. A loss of control of my own life, mindlessly (and heartlessly) drifting from one activity to the next. All the evil and chaos and injustice unleashed on the world by governments that, at most all levels, seem to be bent on taking absolute control of each and every facet of their citizens' lives. It is too easy to feel that one has lost control in the midst of this chaos.

No more.

It was like I was denyig myself the opportunity to have this control. Like I somehow felt that I was less than human for allowing these things to keep me feeling this way. But perhaps my feeling this is proof of my humanity. I will not allow myself to be held down by these restraints that are imposed on me ultimately by nobody other than myself.

My life is mine to control as I see fit. I will live it according to my will and the will of God, and no one else.

I have taken a long time and put a lot of thought into this. I have documented those flaws in myself that I feel need to be changed. I will change those that I can. I will embrace thost that I cannot.

It was my perception of these flaws and this lack of control that held me back from happiness, something that I thought long ago would be forever denied to me. To be such a wreck, useless to myself and those around me, what right do I have to happiness? But over time, I came to "understand" that this lack of happiness was to be my destiny, and in a wierd way, found contentment in that fact. I found an almost twisted sort of satisfaction in that. But then I realized that this too was a complete nonsense. More illusory restraints strapped to me by a damaged psyche.

I can be happy, and by God, I will be happy! I will reclaim that last missing part of myself and become the person that I was always meant to be. I will tear down that last barrier, the dam holding back that last part of my soul I felt to have been long buried and lost to myself: my art. The expressive essence that allows me to pour out my true soul to the rest of the world. I gave up drawing for a long time. I felt to depressed to draw... or perhaps I was depressed because I did not draw? I does not matter which it was, the end effect was the same: more depression, more loss of control, more self-loathing.

No more.

If you live in Georgia, try and keep your ear to the ground for news of an up-and coming comic book penciler. And more particularly if you live in Laurens County, pay closer attention. Who knows, a certain someone might be running for a County Commissioner seat very soon...? At very least there might be a few rumblings on the political horizion...

I Want A New Term, One That Won't Make Me Sick...

2005-08-25T15:10:00.000-05:00

Big Brother.

It is the term from George Orwell's classic novel 1984 we hear often used to refer to the encroachment of an ever-growing government. Especially as it lecherously worms its way deeper and deeper into every facet of our lives.

I am so sick of this phrase.

You know what I think every time I turn on the news or surf the web and see the term? That apparently the entireity of America thinks its just sooooo smart because it has apparently read this ONE book.

Don't take this the wrong way. I think that 1984 is a good book and one can learn a lot from it, and see a lot of parallels between the events in the book and the trends in our society (especially over the last 20 years). But I hope nobody has a real Big Brother like that. A big brother is supposed to be someone that really is looking out for you and trying to protect you from the dangers of the real world.

And I am sure everyone is out there saying "but its the irony of the way a big brother is classically perceived and the way that Big Brother / government is portrayed." "You just don't get it."

No, I do in fact get it.

I just wish I didn't get it so often.

Pat Robertson: Rewriting Reality Through The Tool of Denial!!!

2005-08-25T02:17:00.000-05:00

Please tell me what is or is not going through that strange man's mind.

Seriously.

How can that man be so deluded as to think getting on his show and denying after he gets this national buzz started that he did not say what he in fact said? Is he honestly so mentally defecient that he does not remember saying it, or did he realize the potential legal ramifications for openly calling for the assassination / murder of another human being!!! Maybe he's just trying to cover his butt on this one.

Sorry. I realize this isn't really an opinion or legitimate post or anything. I just heard the news about that nutball's refusal to accept the reality of his own actions. I just had to vent for a few.

Questioning Self Part 1: Taking Five Against Take 2

2005-08-24T17:14:00.000-05:00

This is going to be the first in a series of twice-weekly posts where I chronicle how I feel I am changing and what happens that really makes me question myself and my beliefs.

I've been really depressed and in a deep funk for the past few weeks. I've grown to question values I once held very closely and am really changing my views in ways I never expected. I've become much more conservative in areas I once considered myself to be very liberal and more open to ideas I had once been very closed to. Still, there is one thing in the news the past few months that has really made the new self I am becoming question my old self.

Video games. In particular, the violence and sexual content therein. Even more in particular is the complaining about how these things "are proving to be detrimental to our society." I stayed up late last night / early this morning watching a special on G4Tv about sex in video games, and this has finally pushed me to espouse my views on this. By the way, this special is being rebroadcast several times throughout the week, and I highly suggest watching it if you get the chance. It is very informative.

There were many valid points raised on all sides of this issue but I really am tired of some of the things I keep hearing on the issue and the things I'm not hearing about the issue. As loathe as I am to admit it, there probably is a viable link between violence and sex in video games encouraging violence and a skewing of society's sexuality and views thereof. I used to think that it this was a complete crock of $hit (if you'll pardon my french), but now I can see how there is some degree of validity to this.

But I need to stand in defense of the video game companies that have entertained me for so many years. Most games are not mis-marketed by their makers. The ESRB rating system is an effective tool when used properly. The only flaw I see in the system is that there should be someone on these review panels for games to actually play through some of the games, but still as far as an "independent commission" set up by the video game industry to regulate itself and point out its flaws, at it least does a better job than certain other "independent commissions" ( 911 Committee appointed by George Bush *cough*cough*). Sorry, must've had a little something in my throat there. Maybe when all this "Hot Coffee Mod" stuff got started, Take 2 should not have come out and said it was a complete hack, and then rescind that statement and say that the hackers unlocked disabled content. But as the game stood, it was a "Mature" game and was marketed as such. Had the disabled content been active, I'm sure then it would have recieved an "Adults Only" rating and been marketed thusly.

There are other things that need to be considered when people complain about these games getting into the hands of children. You need to admit that once its rated and on the shelves, a lot of it is out of the developers' hands. And A few people aren't going to like what I'm about to say, so don't say you weren't warned. Okay, here goes.

If a game is rated as "Teen", "Mature", or "Adults Only" then retailers and renter services need to check ID. I'm sorry, I don't care if the person is your friend or if you would feel uncomfortable doing so. I got over it towards the end of my 4.5 years (some of the worst years of my life) working at a video rental store and carded. I made a lot of people mad, but it needs to be done.

Parents and gaurdians, you need to read the labels and ratings of what you are buying for your kids. Despite what you might want to think, game companies accurately depict game content and the little box around the ratings symbol on the back of the box tells you what you or your child will encounter during the course of the game. Coarse language. Sexual conetent. Violence (cartoon and realistic). It's all there. There really is little excuse. Unless you think your child is mature enough to handle it, do not buy it or rent it for them. You might say "Well, I can't monitor my child 24-7 and they might encounter the stuff at their friend's house or the guy at the store might sell it to them or rent it to them anyway." That's true. But then those are issues to take up with those friends (or their parents) and the stores in question, not an industry that has made great efforts to try and make sure that their products are used by and sold / rented to their intended audience for said product. That's what my parents did for me. I grew up on cartoons and comic books, and as I started to grow up and mature and my intrests changed, my parents guided me through a lot of the new concepts and subject material I was going to encounter. They made sure that it was slowly introduced to me as they thought I was mature enough to handle it. They did not let T.V. and the media raise me. And that is what parents today need to do. I'm sorry if that means that you have to spend time with your child and take a more active roles in their lives, but they are your children and it needs to be done.

I'm sure a lot of people have a lot to say about the points I've addressed here. Comment and I'll respond. But if you take one thing away from everything I've said today, let it be this: if you feel that society is degenerating and becoming more detrimental to everyone, you're going to have to take a more active hand in reshaping your world than just complaining about it.

Utah Rave Shut Down: Looks Into An Impending "Rave"nous Police State

2005-08-23T19:39:00.000-05:00

I'm not much of a rave person. But like a lot of things, it's kind of a "to each his own" deal. The music I'm kind of into, the crowds... not so much. I do concerts and large public gatherings on rare occassions, but I'm starting to digress. Back to the issue at hand for a moment.

At 11:30 p.m. this past Saturday in Utah, a legal outdoor music event reffered to as a "rave" was shut down by law enforcement. There was no apparent reason for the law enforcement to be there in my opinion. It seems to me that the law enforcement heard the word "rave" and ran in guns ablaze (metaphorically speaking, of course) because of the stereotypical associations with the word. You know, youth, drugs, lawbreaking, etc...

As my understanding of the concept goes, "raves" are typically underground music events held in abandoned warehouses / buildings and the like, occassionally clubs. Posting and espousing a mantra of peace, unity, respect... and something else that escapes my mind at the moment. Sometimes raves get a loose association with the anarchist movement (that part seems pretty much like bollicks to me). Drugs and drug use don't seem to be actively promoted but usually is kind of overlooked. But mostly its just a lot of people getting together and enjoying trance / techno / rap music. That's my limited understanding of raves, and a more extreme version of this is likely what the law enforcement was operating under at the time. I'll try and go to a few one day and revisit the topic in the future. I'm sure I'll get a lot of comments about this, trying to correct me on the nature of raves, and I wholeheartedly encourage the submission of such comments. I genuinely would like to learn more about these events.

Back to the event in particular, it seems to me that it was simply an outdoor promotional concert that just capitalized on the word "rave." To my knowledge, the organizer had a business license, got an outdoor gathering permit from the county, took out a $2 million insurance policy for the event, hired security for the event to "keep the peace" and confiscate drugs and other contraband. But for some reason law enforcement clad in what looks more like military gear and fatigues even than SWAT gear and broke up what seemed to be Woodstock-light.

The thing that distresses me more than the event itself is the utter lack of mainstream news coverage. I've only noticed a few cordial nods at some places, but overall the almost police-state-like nature of the approach to it. Instead, they all seem to be ratings-milking the Cindy Sheehan protest and polarizing it and throwing it all about the political spectrum since it seems that everybody under the sun can find something from this to use and further their own cause, whatever that cause may be.

You can find some pictures from the rave raid as well as a compilation of related articles here at Infowars.com.

Apologies In Advance

2005-08-23T18:22:00.000-05:00

As I am very new to the "art of blogging," and am hard at work customizing the site to my tastes and filling out my profile, the site will probably be changing a lot for the next few days. Bear with me, hopefully it'll all be ironed out by the end of the week and I'll have everything set to a format that I can live with (for the next few months at least).

Pat Robertson: Assassinate Good Times C'Mon!

2005-08-23T18:14:00.000-05:00

I'll admit that I wish something else would have spurred me into blogging. I really do. I'm not entirely sure why this did it for me, but sometimes something just so mind-numbingly strange just spurs you to do something you didn't think you would ever do.

I noticed when I logged onto CNN.com today and noticed that, well here's what the headline for the article read...
----------
Robertson: U.S. should assassinate Venezuela's Chavez
State Department says comment 'inappropriate'

Tuesday, August 23, 2005; Posted: 3:20 p.m. EDT (19:20 GMT)

Robertson, shown here in a file photo, said Venezuela's Chavez "is a dangerous enemy."
(CNN) -- Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson has called for the United States to assassinate Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez, calling him "a terrific danger" bent on exporting Communism and Islamic extremism across the Americas.

Here is a link to the article in it's entirety.

----------

I have personally disliked Pat Robertson for a long time now. He shares a new type of arrogance and dislike for anyone who does not share a xeroxed copy of his beliefs that I find disconcerting to see among many of today's tele-evangelists. He also seems to operate under some new variant of Bizarro-logic that allows him to... well, let me try this another way. Do you remember the concept of double-think from George Orwell's 1984? He seems to be kind of like that... except for no, or at least very little, logic seems to be involved. He decides he does or does not like something, slaps a "Christian values" label on it and calls it a day.

Before this goes any further and I get people screaming at me, I am in no way, shape, or form, anti-Christian. I am a Christian myself. I just have a severe dislike for hypocrites and bigots who blindly embrace any rhetoric or belief / belief structure without doing any research themselves.

What Christian value is it that gets a man to stand in front of the world on television and directly call for the United States to assassinate another world leader? Seriously. Unlike others, I will go ahead and say I don't know much about Hugo Chavez and what he has done to his country, but there have to be other legitimate avenues to persue first before assassinating someone. Of course, that might be the last shred of my altruistic optimism rearing its ugly head again.

Apparently I am not the only one who shares theses sentiments. Along with the seemingly endless fountain of information in the mainstream and non-mainstream media sources, a Venezualan lawmaker has voiced similar opinions about Mr. Robertson, also posted on CNN.com.

Here is a link to that article in its entirety .

More on this later. Class time approaches ever so closer now...